Alright kids, it’s finally time to resume my pretty awful hockey picks. I know you’ve all probably heard of/been in contact with the swine flu by now and it’s probably my fault in some way or another. After an epic week of partying to conclude the winter semester I contracted some type of super virus. I had swine before it was even popular. Not much has changed since I posted a month ago other than the Apple Juice community of Ottawa should be sending me a thank you card for the gallons I’ve drank trying to rid myself of this pork-ridding disease.

Alright, down to business. My round 1 NHL hockey picks fared decently well. I went 5 for 8 which in these economic turbulent times is respectable. Our good friend Oral-B went 6 for 8 and McGuire went 5 for 8 as well. Crap. I tied Pierre. What a disappointing series of events. However, you should see how smart I was in my picks. I correctly predicted that number 1 pick in the west either makes it to the cup final or loses in the first round (Sharks out after 1) and I solved the debate over which Championship covers more sports karma (NFL all the way, should have known).

 Round 2 I did not get my picks out in time, however Oral-B slipped up slightly, going 2 for 4. But! This doesn’t matter because he’s picking Carolina and the Blackhawks in the finals, with the Blackhawks winning it all. Now that’s a solid pick. My Stanley Cup picks went out in the first and second round (Philly/Sharks, and then changed to Vancouver/Carolina). So I’m going to stay away from NHL hockey picks and leave it to the expert known at Oral-B. How is Pierre McGuire doing? Who the hell knows! His hockey picks are more hidden than the reason he’s still an analyst for TSN/NBC. So McGuire/Swine flu may have taken me down, but Oral-B will live forever and we shall have a Stanley Cup parade for him like the city of Boston did for Ray Bourque.

So there you have it folks. Just wanted to get these picks up there before things start getting crazy and I get some second round of weird animal disease. I assume the next one will be either squirrel or skunk related. Around my house they are like the other type of homeless person. You usually have to walk by them slowly so they won’t bother you and can’t leave things out at night or they’ll get into them.

Alright, this wasn’t that interesting of a post so I apologize; funnier ones to come. I’ll leave you with the greatest boxer of our lifetime practicing for his next fight. Hopefully he doesn’t have to fight anything with a bit more pixels. Yah that’s right, I went there.

And that’s a barely literate post.